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  Have you got a pet name for your significant other? Is it

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  Somebody's date went poorly up on the Paradise Pool carpark last night. We usually find opened condom packets and a bunch of toilet paper strewn around. Get a room, boys.

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  the first tenet of long term relationships is to never acknowledge that they fart. 26 years of silence.

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  Huge score to anyone who can get a US far right newsoganda outlet to publish the fact that Lindsay Graham was well respected in Australia and often referred to with honorific postnomials, such as Lindsay Graham, FMD. Naturally this is a classically Aussie shortened reference to 'Feted Munted Drongo,' always spoken in reverent hushed tones, which requires lifelong outstanding commitments to excellence to obtain.

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  RE: https://dmv.community/@jcrabapple/116994569408558178 Anne Hathaway with words

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  Once again i have been plagued by the scourge of toenails. They are without purpose, require frequent maintenance, blood is frequently spilled doing so, are inconveniently placed and are a nuisance to society. Please join the Coalition Against Toenails to see them banned once and for all. I am confident this movement will have @catsalad@infosec.exchange as a founding patron n'est ce pas? #Cat 🐱

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  Today's yobbo strine lesson for non-strayans

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  Pumpernickel isn't really bread, it's floor sweepings from a grain mill formed into damp pudding and baked for yonks with residual heat when a bakery's ovens were cooling down. Cracked rye grains dampen for a half-day with salt water, pressed into a well sealed loaf pan then baked on low heat (105°C) for 24 hours. No gluten in rye so the loaf is stuck together with caramelisation of the sugars in the rye. 2 days into this trip, another 2-3 days wrapped in cling film to equalise moist...

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  cheap booze in Australia can kill you https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHyiP2GchgY

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  Alarmed by a billion PCs still using #Windows10, MS extends security support for another year til Oct 2027. I'm running an inherited PC which was a hot-shit gamer box in 2015. With SSDs it's a proper screamer, booting in about 12 sec. It's not Win11 compatible and I don't want win 11 if I can avoid it. I don't want to replace it and I def am not interested in Linux stuff as several of my #hamradio apps are not compatible with them. #lesigh

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  I rarely comment on US politics- I renounced my US citizenship for a good reason. However, I'm moved to remark that Mitch McConnell is not dead. It's just resting Mitch face. 😵 https://apnews.com/article/mitch-mcconnell-senate-illness-hospital-566a584e28137458111cd28ecfceaf8e

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  @catsalad@infosec.exchange 'Catsy! BUST ME OUDDA DIS JOINT!'

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  @ketan@climatejustice.social hay 47. Quotable Katherine Hayhoe today: 'You can say you don't believe in gravity but if you jump off a cliff, you're going down' https://bsky.app/profile/katharinehayhoe.com/post/3ml7gw5b2cs2r

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  @annaghughes@mastodon.online that is a carpet lion

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  @catsalad I never had a problem with levitating cats until I found out the source of the jet propulsion 🐈 💨 💩

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  @catsalad Void's decision will not favour you. #glare

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  Australian quasi-public broadcaster SBS has an online on-demand streaming service. They sent an email saying my acct would be deleted because I had not used it in 5 years, so I needed to log in and watch a video. In so doing, they reminded me why I stopped trying to use the platform. SBS's over-the-air broadcast service originally was ad-free until a previous conservative Aus govt demanded SBS must run advertising else they would be beating the commercial TV stations out of viewers.

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  RE: https://mastodon.social/@weezmgk/116474916025526804 Unplugged and replugged everything, USB sound card disappears and reappears as expected but USB Audio CODEC doesn't reappear in WSJT-Z. #hamradio Deleting and reinstalling usbaudio2.sys doesn't fix it. Soft restart doesn't restore the USB Audio CODEC. Hard power down & power up restores the USB Audio codec.

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  Sometimes I worry that Duolingo is teaching me fake Japanese words 🤔

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  @catsalad Yes, there is! Unfortunately it is nuclear powered.

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  @VeroniqueB99@mastodon.social sooo close... laurel (bay) leaves... I hae it when they miss the joke by THAT 🤏 much

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  @Pepijn everybody DUCK

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  @KiwiEV we're coffee truthers.

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  I still manage some social media accts for ppl who still use Xhitter. As such, I look around in the smoking wasteland from time to time and am moved to grill some MAGAts. The ones which fry up to the best colour (burnt crust and charcoal flavour with repetitive spluttering) are those who insist that the US is a 'christian nation,' (heaps around zombie jesus day) And it's easy. All you have to do is ask how many times jesus is mentioned in the US Constitution. 😼 Lolz...

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  What an absolute pusillanimous coward. Gets tied on to his support structure with a bit of twine, not nailed on with railroad spikes through the hands and feet. Bleeds a bit from his 'crown of thorns,' treated for minor injuries by... the Red Cross, ironically enough. You better be on death's door if you want my attention, pookie https://www.tuko.co.ke/people/622306-man-sustains-injuries-portraying-crucifixion-jesus-good-friday-ceremony/

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  @Gargron@mastodon.social yaaay! so... where's the flying cars, Rochko? Oh. 🤔

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  Grrlchild thinks this old mudwest US church could be a brewpub and live band venue. You can tell it's a former church because it's ex-spired. #WWJD #WhatWouldJesusDrink Can rough-in more plumbing if someone wants to turn water into wine.

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  someone has got to stop this reckless pilot from killing his family over and over, it's got to be tiresome

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  The only thing Trump will be sad about regarding killing 57 children in a bombing he ordered on a school is he didn't get to fuck any of them first. https://mastodon.social/@crooksandliars@crooklyn.social/116154336718137594

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  Cactus night blossom #gardeningau #bloomscrolling